It Must Be Hard Being A Lady

On my way to the office after lunch, I saw this lady that left me smiling all the way. Being a naturally born artist, I am tempted to go into description of what caught my eyes. But lets first walk through this together.

God is  a good God. He literally created women with men in mind and vice versa. He sure is an artistic God. Like iron and magnet, He created them for each other. Like a moth after a source of light, He designed man after a woman. Like a cameraman after a rainbow or a setting sun, He adapted man's eyes for her beauty.

Art is in my blood. I like beauty. If not loving it, then I adore it.  A number of my friends know me for my love for detail, color and anything that catches my optical attention and ignites my imagination. Despite this individual liking for Art, I believe all men are artists in a way. I am talking on behalf of  men because that's the easiest way to approaching my article. I believe men like what they see. Its in their nature to ogle and lose attention even in your ( read girl friend/wife) presence. Forgive him if he did this the last time you were together. Its not his fault. He cant help it.
This might be contrary to what a number of you expect me to  say. To meet your expectations in some way and to accommodate you, I'm going to break it down. After all I need you to walk with me.

At the teenage up to the early adulthood stage, men are more of entirely visual beings. Not that they turn blind when they become adults. I say this because of the saying " The way to a man's heart is through his stomach" Anyway how do we make a 21st century lady go to the kitchen without having to cause 3rd world war at home? Anyway, don't take it lightly. Who would imagine eating a semi cooked food for supper. We all desire good cooking, women included. This statement makes sense to a man whose immediate concern is having a lifetime helper to cover up for his weakness. Women supplement men while men on the other hand supplement women thus the idea of marriage.

Now let me get back to my argument. In my last writing on the L.O.V.E Thing, I went biblical and mentioned Genesis 2:23 where Adam liked what he saw and named Eve Woman because she was from a man's bone and flesh. The idea of Genesis makes me believe that women have had the pressure to look appealing to a man since the creation story.

To stick to the title of my article, it must be really hard for the ladies to keep on lighting the world. Ask Esther Passaris of Adapt A Light organization in Kenya. Men desire to see women at their best. That's what women have been made to believe. Sue me if you don't carry a mirror, lotion, mascara, perfume etc etc in your hand bag. I don't know if that was God initial plan. Its like the pressure to look good, appealing and attractive is so engraved in a woman's mind. Are men to blame for this? Do we put so much pressure on our ladies in terms of what we expect them to look like?

Does every lady believe in the passage Psalms 139:14 that you are wonderfully and fearfully made? I love the way the Psalmist begins by praising God and then ends with reassuring himself that he knows  very well he is wonderfully and fearfully made.

Now back to what I saw after my lunch break. This was an already light skinned lady who had gone ahead and applied red like make up to appear lighter.  That was not strange to me. I'm used to ladies with make up. I have nothing wrong with make up anyway. After all men nowadays also do groom themselves. We also want to get her attention and to generally look presentable to the world.
What I have a problem with is why some women have been made to believe what the world considers beautiful and not what God says.  The grass has been presented as greener on the other side. A light lady has been made to believe black is beautiful while on the other hand a black skinned lady wants nothing to do with blackness nor believes that black is beautiful but does everything to appear slightly light. If only Steve Biko and the black is beautiful slogan advocates had lived much more longer.

It sure must be hard being a lady in a world where the west is the benchmark of beauty. " You are either a Beyonce or a Nun" ...."How will you get a man when the western standards for beauty is waist zero. How do you get a man when they are all after figure eight?"... "You will die single if you are never going to enroll in a gymnasium. "..."No plum shaped lady has ever got himself a husband!" ..."Please invest in high heals or else dudes will bypass you for the model heights..." " If only I had a slightly larger butt, he would not have dumped me for her"..."Are you aware that chemists nowadays sell butts enlarging gels?" That must be the girl talk in most of the women wash rooms worldwide.

Isn't the world unfair for our ladies? Imagine a plum like (sorry if i sound rude) shaped woman living in the western world. Or a slender lady in a traditional African society where a woman is judged by the fullness of her physical orientation. Don't you think the world is a living hell for them if they have an issue with their esteem? Accepting and loving yourself in such a cultural environment can be quite hard. This is because of the strong cultural influence that dictates what is beautiful and what is not. 

It must be really hard having to strip almost naked to make a living. I don't imply that men don't go to this extent but watching a lady in some music videos will drive my point home. Imagine a male musician shooting a music video fully dressed like an Eskimo in the Arctic region and with him are our poor sisters dressed for a sun bath at the beach. It sure is hard being a lady.

While a number of men like light skinned ladies, there are others who would kill to have a black berry. May be its true that the darker the berry the sweeter the juice. On the other hand, there are those who prefer a slender campus figure lady as they are called here in Uganda. God knows us the way we are and has a reason as to why he created us  this way. The heavy weights make good weight lifters while the light weights are the track masters. Both are athletes anyway. We are all beautiful in different capacities.

Is it because no one is made perfect that's why we keep going over board in search of perfect selves? I don't know. The last time I read the creation story, God liked what He created. Keeping it natural and accepting yourself the way you are does not mean you will die alone. It does not mean no one will find you attractive.
Men too have their own pressures. Imagine failing the ladies' Tall Dark and Handsome (TDH) entry mark. It must be terrible for guys too. Some also wish they were slightly taller by some inches. Others wish they were a bit heavier than they are. The bald headed claim to admire Michael Jordan but we know better. Some even have never been to a basketball court. A majority of those with beer bellies curse their hands for never letting go of the brown bottle. But all the same people must come to terms with who they are. If you don't love yourself the way you are who will?
Don't you now believe in God's word through the Psalmist that you are wonderfully and fearfully made?

If not, then you are really finding it hard being who you are.